TEACHING NOTES Introduction In this study of Ephesians, Paul has been teaching us about the new way of life that followers of Jesus have been called to live. Last week, we learned about certain behaviors that must be avoided at all cost so that we can live with wisdom and inherit the kingdom of God. This week, Paul is going to give us the clearest instructions for Christian marriage. Note: For a condensed parallel of today’s passage see Col. 3:18-4:1. ​ Ephesians 5:21 ESV 21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. Submitting to one another = While many modern translations put verse 21 at the end of the previous paragraph (Eph. 5:15-20), it is actually the beginning of the section on marriage (Eph. 5:21-33). We know this because there is not verb “submit” in verse 22. The Greek literally reads, “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” Therefore, Paul’s main idea is submission to each other, but then he is going to explain what that looks like for each member of the household. What does it mean to submit to one another? Paul gives us his definition in Phil. 2:3 “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” Submission is mutual, not one-sided. How should wives submit? ​ Ephesians 5:22–24 ESV 22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Wives [submit] to your husbands = As stated above, “submit” does not appear in this verse but is assumed based on the verb “submitting” in verse 21. The Christian wife should count her husband more significant than herself, while rejecting selfishness and pride. Culturally, it would have been shocking for any wife (believer or not) to refuse to submit to her husband. Therefore, Paul is saying that even pagans wives practice submission, and Christians wives should provide the greatest example of submission based in love. However, Paul is going to redefine submission to go beyond mere social or cultural practices. The husband is the head of the wife = Some see this as proof that the husband has authority over the wife. While that may be included, authority is not Paul’s point. Unity and interdependence is the point. For Paul, the head leads the body but also depends on the body. Christ is the head of the church, and though He does not need the church, He has chosen to partner with the church as His body. The husband is the head of the household and depends on each part to make a family. How should husbands submit? ​ Ephesians 5:25–27 ESV 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. Love your wives = Why did Paul need to tell husbands to love their wives? Because these Gentiles are immersed in Greco-Roman culture where husbands are not expected to love their wives. Paul is teaching the Ephesians that Christian marriage is entirely different from pagan marriage. Pagan marriage was centered on social or financial needs and desires. Christian marriage is centered on Christ, whose very nature is love (1 John 4:16). As Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her = As we have already seen, Paul defines the love of Christ as sacrificial. Jesus’ death for sinners is the greatest display of the highest form of love (John 15:13; Rom. 5:8). To follow the example of Christ, husbands are called to give themselves up for their wives. That he might sanctify her = The Greek word for “sanctify” is hagiazo, which means to make holy (set apart as unique/special). Just as God called Abraham out of a pagan world to create a people who would be set apart for Himself, Jesus calls us out of the world to make us a holy people. Cleansed her by the washing of water with the word = Followers of Jesus have been “cleansed” (Grk. hatharizo) or made pure with the word of God. This is exactly what Jesus told His disciples in John 15:3 “Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you.” So that he might present the church to himself in splendor = The Greek word for “present” is paristemi, which means to stand by, to cause to be, or to show to be true. A more literal translation would be, “so that he may stand with the church himself in glory.” Christ sanctifies His church so that He may stand proudly by/with her when she is presented in glory to the throne of God. ​ Ephesians 5:28–30 ESV 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. He who loves his wife loves himself = A common theme from Lev. 19:18 to Jesus’ great commandment in Matt. 22:37-40 is loving your neighbor as yourself. Jesus declared that loving God and your neighbor fulfills the entire law of God. Paul is using this as the backdrop for his teaching on marriage. Your spouse is your closest neighbor. The Christian husband is to love his closest neighbor (his wife) as himself. Nourishes and cherishes = A husband takes care of his own body by providing what he needs to survive. In the same way, the husband must nourish his wife by providing for her needs and well-being. But a husband must also cherish his wife. The Greek word for “cherish” is thalpo, and refers to providing care and comfort. Therefore, a husband must provide physical and emotional provision. Because we are members of his body = Here we find the greatest reason why Christian husbands must do what Paul is teaching. Every member of a Christian household is a part of the body of Christ and must be treated accordingly. ​ Ephesians 5:31 ESV 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” Paul is quoting from Gen. 2:24. The reason for this quote is profound. **The daily devotions will cover this in more detail.** Leave his father and mother = A husband and wife cannot build a new household if they are still attached to their parents, whether financial or otherwise. If a couple cannot afford to leave their parent’s home, they are not prepared to be married. Hold fast to his wife = In Gen. 2:24, the Hebrew word for “hold fast” is dabaq, which means to cling to or to be fastened together. A couple must leave their parents in order to cling to their spouse. They must leave in order to cleave. The two shall become one flesh = In order to fully understand what Paul is teaching in Eph. 5:21-33, we must go back to the Hebrew scriptures that form the basis for Paul’s thinking. Becoming one flesh in Gen. 2 is grounded in Gen. 1:27. ​ Genesis 1:27 ESV 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. Man = The Hebrew word for “man” used here is ha adam, which is not a name but a reference to “the human” which is singular. Therefore, it literally reads, “So God created the human in his own image, in the image of God he created him” which is all in singular terms. Male and female he created them = Here we see a movement from singular to plural terms. The one human is now two parts of “the human.” Therefore, God intends a unity of plurality, because in Gen. 2:24 the “two shall become one flesh.” God created “the human” (singular) as “male and female” (plural) and brings them together as “one flesh” (singular). Now let’s see how Paul ties this all together... Ephesians 5:32–33 ESV 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. This mystery is profound = Grk. touto mysterion eimi megas - “Profound” (Grk. megas) does not mean hidden or not able to be understood, but simply that it is great. Remember that for Paul the “mystery” is God’s will (Eph. 1:9) and is no longer hidden, but has now been revealed in Christ (Eph. 3:7-9). What is the mystery that was revealed in Christ? Eph. 3:6 “This mystery is that the Gentiles are fellow heirs, members of the same body, and partakers of the promise in Christ Jesus through the gospel.” The unity of all people in Christ reveals the will of God. It refers to Christ and the church = Marriage, which is meant to unify the two parts of “the human” is a picture of what God is doing through Christ for all people. Marriage is a picture of reconciliation. Therefore, we can use what God is doing in marriage to explain the Gospel. Just as God created marriage to unite male and female into one flesh, God sent Jesus to unite people into His family. Love his wife as himself = Apparently, Paul knew that men would need to be reminded of this again. Let the wife see that she respects her husband = The backdrop here is Gen. 3:16 “Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.” Paul knew that one of the results of sin is a relational struggle for power. Wives will desire the opposite of their husband’s and husbands will desire to rule over their wives. Eph. 5:21-33 is the best solution for this problem. We reject ruling over each other by submitting to one another in love and respect. Conclusion For those who are single, you have the unique opportunity to be solely focused on Christ. A proper response for singles to this teaching is to renew your commitment to Christ through worship, prayer, and communion. For those who are married, this is an opportunity to center your marriage on Christ so that He may be honored and glorified through your home.