TEACHING NOTES ‌ Introduction In this series so far we have covered several important areas of marriage. We began by learning the biblical definition of love. Then we learned about why we have conflict in relationships. Last week we learned about how to use our words to build each other up, rather than tear each other down. Today, we’re going get to the most important part of marriage—imitating Christ. ‌ Ephesians 5:1–2 ESV 1 Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. 2 And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. ‌ Walk in love = This is how we imitate or image God—we walk/live in love. ‌ As Christ loved us and gave himself up for us = The example of real love is self-sacrifice. We follow Christ’s example and give ourselves up for others. ‌ Fragrant offering to God = In the Old Testament when sacrifices were offering in faith and repentance, it was “a pleasing aroma to the LORD” (Gen. 8:21; Lev. 17:6). When we give ourselves up for others, our sacrifice is pleasing to God. ‌ Ephesians 5:15–17 ESV 15 Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. ‌ Look carefully = Grk. blepo akribos - This phrase could also be translated, “Look accurately” meaning to be careful to live in reality. Modern life is often lived flippantly and without much thought. Paul tells us to be careful how we live, because we’re surrounded by constant deception. ‌ Not as unwise but as wise = Living according to wisdom, not according to the foolish ways of the world. What follows is Paul’s explanation of wise living. ‌ Making the best use of the time = In Greek, this phrase is literally, “redeeming the time.” Everyone alive has only a limited amount of time. When left to ourselves, we are prone to waste the time we have. The wise redeem the time that would have been wasted and make the best use of the time they have left. ‌ Because the days are evil = The Greek word for “evil” here poneros, which can mean evil or affliction/pain. Paul likely means both morally evil and full of pain. Life has enough natural affliction without us adding more with bad decisions. Paul wants us to be intentional with our time, because everything is working against us. ‌ Understand the Lord’s will = Fools live as if God has no plan for their lives. Fools simply live for their own desires. As disciples of Jesus, we devote time each day to seek God’s will and time each week to gather together to seek Him. ‌ Are you making the best use of the time you have left? Psalm 90:12 “So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.” ‌ Ephesians 5:18–20 ESV 18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, 19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, 20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, ‌ Drunkenness leads to debauchery = The reason why we should never get drunk is because it leads to debauchery. The Greek word for “debauchery” is asotia, which means to be reckless, wild, or loss of self-control. When a person is drunk they cast off moral boundaries, which is deadly. ‌ Be filled with the Spirit = Do not be filled with alcoholic spirits, but with THE Spirit of God. Followers of Jesus should be filled and overflowing with the Holy Spirit. ‌ Addressing one another = This requires believers to be together. When we gather together we sings songs and read Scripture together. This is our way of giving thanks for everything God has done. ‌ Ephesians 5:21 ESV 21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. ‌ Submitting to one another = The Greek word for “submit” is hyptasso, which means to put another above yourself. This word also includes the idea of binding ourselves together (see Gen. 2:24; Eph. 5:31). Notice that this is a voluntary act, rather than a forced submission. It is a mutual desire to be joined together in such a way that brings true unity. ‌ Out of reverence for Christ = We sacrifice/submit to others, not only for their sake, but to honor Christ. When we have our eyes on Christ, we will want to submit to one another. We will want to be like Christ. ‌ Ephesians 5:22–24 ESV 22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. ‌ Wives to your husbands, as to the Lord = Remember, it is not only the wife who submits to the husband, but also the husband to the wife (Eph. 5:21). Just as the husband and wife submit to Christ, they also submit to each other. ‌ The husband is the head of the wife = Many people read this as referring to leadership, but there is an even deeper meaning—the idea of being inseparable. Just as the church needs Christ (the Head), the home needs a husband and father. According to historical data, most of the problems we see in our society today is the direct result of the loss of husbands and fathers in the home. As the saying goes, “so goes the husband, so goes the home.” ‌ If the wives find that difficult, consider the husband’s job... ‌ Ephesians 5:25–27 ESV 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. ‌ Love your wives, as Christ loved the church = In what way did Christ love the church? He gave His life for her. As already seen from Eph. 5:1, the definition of love is self-sacrifice. The husband is to imitate Christ for His wife by denying himself and taking up his cross for his wife’s sake. ‌ Sanctify her with the word = Christ sacrificed Himself to purify us so we could be reunited with God. In the same way, husbands provide a pure home by leading his family with the word of God. ‌ Present the church as holy = The Greek word for “present” here is paristemi, which also means to stand beside. The work of Christ was finished so that He may stand by us before the Father and declare us holy and blameless. To imitate Christ, the husband lead his home to Christ and disciple his family to be holy (unique or set apart in the world). ‌ Ephesians 5:28–30 ESV 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. ‌ We are members of his body = The husband is to love his wife because she is part of himself. As written in Gen. 2:24 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” And Jesus said, “they are no longer two but one flesh” (Matt. 19:6). The husband and wife are so unified that they are one body. This mirrors the relationship of Christ and His church—we are one just as Jesus and the Father are one (John 17:20-21). ‌ Ephesians 5:31–33 ESV 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. ‌ This mystery refers to Christ and the church = Marriage is designed by God to be a living display of Christ’s love for His church. The better our marriage, the better we understand how much the Father loves us. ‌ Love and Respect: Paul ends with the summary that the husband must love his wife as himself, and the wife must respect her husband. Not by coincidence, women most need love and men most need respect. God knows exactly what we need and provides it through marriage. ‌ Conclusion ‌Our response to what we have learned today is to recommit ourselves to imitate Christ in all that we do. To recommit our families and homes to the will of God. To take Communion as a sign of our faith and our faithfulness to Jesus as our God and Savior. And ask God to bless us and help us to honor Him. ‌